Keeping track of the givers and the disenchanted

You want your church to grow, right? So you need a way to butter up the ones who give and who help in the nursery, while marginalizing the stubborn traditionalists who won't get with the vision. How can you keep track of who is who in your church without taking the trouble to get to know people? You want to be able to track and categorize your members, get familiar with their habits, know who they bank with, know their hobbies, their weaknesses (which might come in handy if they make trouble down the road), their social security numbers and their TV viewing habits.
Luckily, you are not left alone to do these monumental tasks, you have help  when using programs such as this one, with.its "robust contribution model" and its attendance tracking features. Or this one With its donor management and pledge tracking, or Servant Keeper (think Mason Jar)  whose motto is  Organizing God's people." Or maybe "ChurchTrac" that lets you "keep track of your members and prospects." Or any of dozens of other easy-to-use programs.

Church environment and Jesus

When you look at the New Testament, you see that Jesus was interested in leadership philosophies, rebranding and quality audiovisual environments. He told his disciples to go out and lead, he rebranded his disciples with new names, and he'd often go onto mountaintops to create just the right environment for his message: a clear concern with both auditory and visual elements of His presentation.

So when you come across sites like this one, you know that despite the materialistic emphasis, there is core Bibllical truth here.
Can't you just imagine Jesus telling his listeners to "Be holistic, stay current and respect the context"? Just like the beatitudes. If Jesus walked among us today, he'd be the sound guy. Or, maybe not.

Criticize churches and make $$$

What a SWEET DEAL! Only $750 for small churches. Hire yourself out as a church "secret shopper." I know some guys who would gladly give you some Hawaiian Punch, too. And charge only twenty bucks or so.

Fill-in-the-blank Christianity

The sure sign of a devoted Christ follower is a sheet of paper in one hand and a pencil in the other. Committed Christ-followers realize that there is much more to learn in their fellowship walk than they know at the moment. The ones to learn it from are leaders. If you think you can read scripture, pray and follow Christ, without filling in blanks, you are sadly mistaken.
What many novice believers miss is that the blanks matter. The lists matter. The notes matter. The seven ways to, and the three signs of, and the five steps to -- as well as the four ways to, the six rules of, and the three mistakes of.

Baptism doesn't matter much. How you take communion doesn't make a whole lot of difference. Last times doctrines, spiritual gifts and worship style -- all debatable. Church government, ehhhh!
But what matters more than anything else is that you fill in the blanks when you listen, that you look up to your leader with eyes filled with devotion and that you take copious notes. These are the three marks of a sold-out Christ follower.

It's all about what it's all about!

And it's all about this:



"Sunday's Coming" Movie Trailer from North Point Media on Vimeo.
Found on the Be Deviant church site: http://www.bedeviant.com/are-your-worship-services-contemporvant

This video really hits home. This IS the heart of contemporvant worship!

Well, it did until its makers removed it, but somehow, it's back again.
Here is a post about  the initial removal, which is almost as good because of the comments about "planning worship."

A commenter on a CT blog provided the new link, so it's back!

The awesome power of trite phrases

Servant-leaders aren't powerless when it comes to finding themes for messages, not in this day of the practical and culturally cool! The trite phrase is the most cutting-edge tool in a relevant pastor's toolbox today, and it can be a time of deep discovery to invent and hone these phrases.
First, a pastor must come up with something that will make a listener nod and smile. Movement phrases are often effective here. "Let's move forward," though overused, still captures attention. No one wants to be accused of moving backwards or staying still.
For variety, you can add a little oomph by changing that one to "Let's push forward."

Climbing mountaintops, leaving the dock, launching a new something, venturing toward the unknown, taking a leap of faith, diving into something: all these work well as movement-based trite phrases.And don't forget "driven." Anything can drive, just about. Just watch out if you're in the bike lane.

Here are some current trite phrases you can adapt to your own needs:  _______________(passion, purpose, leadership, organization, outlook) is essential, ________________ (creativity, leadership, missional outreach, exponential giving) fires me up, embrace the ________________(something generally thought to be negative: trouble, tension, stress, conflict, hardship), maximize your ____________(something good), are you afraid to ______________(take risks, lead, move forward, be creative, make a plan?

The power of stating the obvious should never be overlooked. Put one foot in front of the other; Together, we can ___________; Never shift in reverse without looking behind you; Breathe deeply and carry a big stick; When pulling weeds, don't pluck up the geraniums; Hot beverages can burn you; Don't fall asleep on the journey; You can only wear one pair of shoes at a time... Any blatantly obvious statement can become a powerful trite phrase.

The advantage of shallow tidbits of advice is that you don't have to spend long hours musing over scripture. You don't even have to spend five minutes reviewing the scripture you once knew. You don't need scripture at all! People will nod knowingly and grin broadly as you throw out little platitudes, and they'll leave the worship center convinced you've brought them closer to God, all with very little prep time! Best of all, they'll come back for more next week. So give it a try. Make up a trite phrase of your own, or borrow some of these.

Always put air in your tires before a long journey, stop worrying about past mistakes; if you wait until the pool is warm enough, you'll never get in; lather, rinse, repeat; don't dive headfirst into a river without knowing what's under the water; if you throw rocks at a bear, you better be prepared to run...

Take a risk, journey forward, take a journey-driven step and make up your own.

The Greatest Commandment

Forget love, forgiveness, charity, faith, discipleship, holiness, service, worship, prayer. The most important aspect of the Christian life today is -- Leadership. We can't be true Christ-followers until we can lead, and until we can lead with vision and purpose.
Leadership!
Next Level Leadership!
Injoy Leadership
Leadership Summit!
Leveraging Leadership Conference!
Innovative Leadership
Equipping Leadership
Echo Leadership (Only $269)
Catalyst Leadership
Adventurous Leadership
Chick-fil-A Leadership
Exponential Leadership

Abandon dull readings of "passages," forsake outdated ideas such as communion, or fellowship, turn your back on such quaint concepts as sacrifice, struggle, seeking God's face or humility. Esteemed church experts now see that the most striking lack in the church is an absence of LEADERSHIP.

Because of the great number of leadership events now available, however, the problem is well in hand and we can breathe a sigh of relief that the church is no longer in peril.

Don't miss this one!

The leadership conference to end all leadership conferences!

Church Leader Alive!

2010
April 31 - May 6
in Spectacular South Dakota!

You will never lead the same after this week!

• A host of powerful, dynamic speakers present on topics guaranteed to bring effectiveness and life to your leadership ministry
• Scores of break-out sessions every leader will find relevant and engaging
• Deluxe accommodations packed with every amenity that leading leaders could want - in luxurious, prairie surroundings

Church Leader Alive! 2010 shows you how you can be empowered for dynamic and active outreach through lots of words. More words than ever before. Best-selling words and top-expert words.

This information-rich conference will empower leaders with the very best resources available from leading churches and speakers. And LEADING is what it's all about. Jesus emphasized leadership more than any other topic, in the Greek, and in the Latin, too.

Leaders will learn how to recharge their congregations - even their youth groups - by challenging them to renew heart, mind, body and spirit through sitting and listening to words.


Learn how to boost efficiency, effectiveness and growth of your church by filling in the blanks on a genuine, preprinted notebook with our logo on it. Don’t miss this rare opportunity to expand your congregation’s capacity for serving the needs of your faith community and surrounding unchurched population.


Discover how you can effectively access a learning-driven, online community of leaders to develop your unique leadership voice. With purpose.


You will be given an entire supply of relationship-building tools and helps, all for a very low price, just as Jesus provided for his leadership followers.


Enjoy the variety of dynamic presenters: Renowned multi-campus pastor John Worshipmonger speaks on profiting from the gospel; Glen Blather, Leadership-Mentoring expert, challenges leaders to increase giving by offering more goodies; Mark Salesemann, pastor of Laodocean Worship Center - a thriving, 15,000 member fellowship - shows how to turn an electronic presence into piles of cash; Blockbuster author Ben Doindat, gives pointers on writing best selling church leadership books; Rich Klerrick, youth group coordinator for the explosive CrashCrunch Hollow Church in Ellendale, ND, gives timely pointers on growing your youth investment; and Josh Joaching, senior pastor of Watch-us-Grow Believer's Fellowship Association, demonstrates how you, too, can organize a pastor conference and profit wildly in just months.


During the week you will see how building strategic alliances can effect change in your congregation, resulting in wholeness, success and overflowing offering plates.

• You will be given tools to strengthen the culture of leadership among decision makers on your leadership team as you scribble furiously during the breakout sessions.
• You will learn how to turn complaints into flattery, shortages into healthy balances both spiritually and financially by hearing how expert superpastors have done it.
• Your growth team will learn 14 ways to make tough decisions by tapping into spiritual reserves and charging up elements of faith - as well as shutting up or kicking out (we call it weed control) those who won't get with the vision.
• Leaders will explore ways to journey into undiscovered, knowledge-rich territory while mapping their gifts and building a championship crew of advisers, partners, co-leaders and mentors.

The 2010 Church Leader Alive! Conference will show you how to build awareness and how to reap spiritual returns. Be so aware that nothing, nothing at all, gets past your gaze.Together with top leadership giants, we will examine relevant, missional ministry strategies, from the inside out, while encouraging authentic, interactive, engaging approaches to the whole church growth process. Through hands-on partnering with experts in growth ministries, and big pledge campaigns, you will begin, very slowly, to become one of the select few top leaders yourself.


There will be refreshing times of training for church worship staff, young and old alike, to discover out-of-the-box methods of reviving an authentic spirit of worship in your services. Empty boxes will virtually litter the foyer!

Every half hour, break-out sessions are available to help leaders learn to recruit and equip ministries -everything from youth outreach to worship team service - focusing on the needs of a new generation needed to fill a growing leadership vacuum, and other challenges today's ministry leaders face.


The conference features leading voices, as well as voice-activated leaders, who will educate and inspire churches to boldly impact their ministries through dynamic tools - and will make learning experiences much more valuable after the conference is over if they can get out of the crowded parking lot.


This conference will provide more than just knowledge. It empowers and recharges! For your conference pack, simply send a $500 deposit to Luxury Pastor Resorts c/o Judas Jeffries, 666 College Park Circle, Gehenna, SD 57666

That pesky cross

Why do Christians focus on the cross all the time? Can't we just fast forward to the resurrection and skip all that bloody, icky stuff? That's pretty much what this post says on the Jesus Hates Papyrus site. (The original post was titled "Take down the cross" but the name has now been changed to "Raise the Resurrection" for some reason.) In the enlightened 21st century, surely we can get past sin and death and skip right to the part where Jesus wants to help you get your oil changed.