If it's creative, edgy and original, it must be of God

Of course, to be creative, edgy and original, you have to avoid using phrases like "of God." We'll just say, "cool" and that pretty much means the same thing, right? God is cool, so if our stuff is unique and imaginative, it's cool and kind of like God's stuff. We can rap, we can use the right fonts, we can paste together relevant-looking video montages and edit them with the coolest techno-gadgets, so of course we're Kingdom-minded and approved. We'll ride the borders, turning off the traditionalists - who will sit there, clucking in their pews at our tattoos or headgear - and we'll know we're in the center of His wil-- Well, the center of What's Happening Now.

You're not ordinary, you're a Creative

You are artistic. You don't think; you create. God has gifted you with extraordinary powers of imagination, and that's why your gifts are in such demand. You have a knack for design, or music, or social networking, or blogging, or expressive thinking. You are one of the inner circle the leaders depend on. You possess a hotline to the Holy Spirit's most important endeavors.
Because of this, your church values your input. It sends you to creative conferences and pays your way. You are among the church elite. You gather with other creatives at brainstorming events. You move the church to embrace new technologies and avenues of ministry, outside the box. In short, you are not like other Christians. You are a step above and you should make this plain to all who don't share your gift.
You should post artsy and relevent comments on Twitter several times a day to let followers know that you are the one to follow. You should quote the right people and develop a persona that screams: Baluga! Or something equally mystifying and esoteric. After all, you're not just an average Joe.